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Resolving Issues  

wilmingtonncm 68M
11 posts
5/3/2015 7:42 pm

Last Read:
8/8/2015 5:57 pm

Resolving Issues


Sometimes a relationship becomes lopsided. One person feels different than the other, or one sees a future the other doesn't. Yet there can also the feeling that the other party isn't really on a different page, but is holding back, is being overly cautious, and at the same time is very much aligned with your own feelings.

It is most unfortunate that when this point is reached as it often leads to the demise of an otherwise outstanding relationship. Resentment, misunderstandings, jealousy, fear - there are a thousand things that go through the mind. And it can lead to the relationship ending prematurely or unnecessarily.

I was beginning to go to that place. Not that I was ready to end it, but the liberal nature of our relationship had lead it to an emotional confusion and frustration. I must add it is a fabulous relationship and I absolutely adore this woman - I was not close to walking away from her. But we had agreed upon being in an "open" relationship where we could see others providing we altered the other first. Neither of us has done so over the course of a year. But I was much more committed through my bio and blog than she; that is to say, I was quite openly involved with only her. And she is in regular communication with other guys who all have the same goal in mind.

This weekend, we talked about this. That has been the difference in this and any other relationship I've been in. We talk. Really talk. Because of what she has been though, I've been more receptive to her testing the field, seeing what is out there. After all, if I was right and the right one, I would shine through the others. But this has gone on and on and has been more of a strain on me.

She more or less made it clear today, publicly, that we are together. We're a pair. We're a couple. While this has occurred in social media recently, it hadn't happened here, which was truly the place to me it had to happen. And it did.

I am grateful.

If you are serious about someone, if you think they are the person you've been looking for your whole life - even if they are different than you expected you'd ever find - talk. Talk openly, honestly, uncomfortably. Say what you have to say coming from your heart. Not through aggravation, frustration or anger. Patience and understanding will trump anger and bitterness every time. But talk.

Talk.

nightsoul1962 61F
17828 posts
5/3/2015 7:55 pm

Well written!!

WITHOUT PASSION LIFE IS NOTHING


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