Doctor's Advice

I was having a problem with premature ejaculation, and I went to the doctor for advice. The doctor said I should try startling myself the next time I felt the urge to prematurely ejaculate. He said it works every time.

On the way home, I stopped at the hardware store and bought a starter pistol thinking it would do the job and surprise my wife. It did both.

We commenced having sex that night, and while in the sixty-nine position I started to prematurely ejaculate. I grabbed the starter pistol and fired it. I had to go back to the doctor the next day to get stitches for my penis and treatment for E-Coli. The doctor asked me what happen?

I told him that when I fired the pistol, my wife pooped on my face, bit three inches off my penis, and the neighbor came out of our bedroom closet with his hands in the air.