20th Anniversary Blogging....the redbird takes flight.

I just realized this evening that I missed my 20th anniversary blogging here on AFF. It all began back on February 14, 2005 (Valentine's Day) and here was my first post....

Blog Post February 14, 2020

I became a paying member of AdultFriendFinder in mid January of 2020. I had been a standard member for quite some time but had never really explored the site. My decision to join came out of a heart to heart discussion I had with my mate of over 25 years a couple months ago.

We got married back in the late 1970's when the Open Marriage concept was still seen as a bit on the edge. Open Marriage then did not only refer to an open sex life. Sex was only a small part of a much broader, somewhat radical look at the closed marriage relationships that then existed.

The new open marriage contract insisted on open communication between the partners; it encouraged role flexibility, role reversals, and role exchanges in the relationship; it encouraged partners to have relationships outside the marriage; and it encouraged partners to seek personal growth outside the relationship to keep the primary relationship fresh and new.

We have tried hard to live the Open Marriage lifestyle and it has served us well. Every day we move out into the world to discover what it has to offer. Every night we re-connect and share what we have learned. It is an exciting thing, exploring and sharing our life together.

Why then am I at AdultFriendFinder one might ask? Well, as I noted above, sex is only a part of the open marriage life style. In the many years of marriage I have had women friends outside of our relationship. Some of these friendships have lasted only months; others have lasted years. Although there has occasionally been physical affection there has never been sex. I have moved into my middle years having only made love to one woman....my mate.

Most of the time this feels just fine. It is interesting to me that I have been married for over 25 years and have never gotten bored with making love. I think this comes from being open to new twists on old ways of doing things. Variety is the spice of life but I try to remember the spices are not the food...they only enliven the food. Making love is about pleasuring your partner...how you do it is not as important as the fact that you do it with an open heart to show your connection to the other.

I sometimes feel, however, that I missed something. I feel like I missed the whole sexual revolution. I did not have a youth filled with sexual experimentation. I have made love to one woman many, many times and I am happy about that experience. But I still wonder what it would be like to make love to another woman. What may I have missed?

So my mate and I shared about our life experiences a couple months back. The question came up...Did we have any regrets? You guessed it...one of mine was not having made love to other women. The upshot of that conversation was encouragement for me to check that out. Checking it out means finding a safe place and a safe partner with whom I can explore. It means doing it in a way where no one gets hurt.

Enough for today.....

Well, over those 20 years I did have sex with other women, 7 or 8 others, and I did travel to Vietnam and Cambodia with one of those women from here on AFF. And in 6 months my mate and I will have been married 50 years. Life is good.