I've had a mild interest in learning how to tie people up, for a quite a while. The problem is, it seems like it's not really something you can just dabble with - you have to commit. I've been to a couple of one night rope workshops but they were too far apart to retain anything. As evidence of my lack of commitment, I'd never even gone so far as to buy any rope.
I recently joined a local rope group. They have a couple of open labs a month that are held at someone's home. I signed up to go to one on Wednesday evening. It's always a little nerve wracking showing up at a new group. I had checked the RSVP's online and only knew one person who was attending (the ginger who I topped a couple of times at fem domme parties).
It was a big group, about 25 people. We did introductions. When I introduced myself toward the end, a guy of similar age piped up and said he had contacted me on Fet to see if I wanted to partner up (I had not seen the message because communications from people who aren't my friends go right into a filtered folder). After introductions the group split up - the more advanced people stayed in the garage to do their own thing, while the rest of us went upstairs for a "101" presentation.
The presenter said he was going to be showing us a basic pattern that could be used for several different kinds of ties. He then demonstrated using the pattern to bind someone's upper body. He went through about 14 different steps on a model, then turned us loose. Uh oh. I am capable of retaining and replicating ONE step. Maybe two. I was OK with being the "rope bunny" and letting my new acquaintance ML go first on me.
(I'll also say that while the presenter was going through the demo, ML tried to make side comments a couple of times - "oh I can show you how to connect a new rope" and I pretty much ignored him because I was trying to focus on what the presenter was doing. So we weren't off to a great start).
ML did do a good job with consent (asking if it was OK to touch me) and produced this nice harness:
He then proceeded to create a fancy rosette in the back as a way of using up the extra rope. Which was somewhat tedious for me, as the rope bottom, and also used up so much time that by the time he was done, the presenter was moving on to tie #2 and there was no time for me to try making the harness on him.
Tie #2 was a simple arm tie - jokingly called a chicken wing. ML let me go first. With lots and lots of step by step coaching, I managed to do it. Not super elegant, but OK for a first try.
Tie #3 was doing the same thing on a leg. Here's the one ML did on me. It doesn't look real great because I don't have the flexibility to bend my leg in super tight.
(I've never been able to do Virasana pose in yoga)
So then I was going to try to do the same on ML. He bent his leg, I got started, but as previously noted I don't retain very well so I immediately needed help...but he was absorbed with finding a video on his phone so he could play a song. I patiently waited to get his attention, he continued ignoring me, and so I started pulling the ropes off of his leg.
ML: You look like you've given up, smarty.
Me: Yes, well, I need to be walked through it step by step and you seemed absorbed with your phone.
ML: Oh. I figured since I was the bottom I could just sit back and relax.
Kind of an asshole move I think. Even if I had not needed help, it would have been rude for him to be doing stuff on his phone while I was tying him.
Even though I was kind of PO'd at him, I let him do another harness in the remaining time, and I have to admit it made my boobs look good.
Once again he took forever to do something elaborate with the loose ends in the back and I got a little bored.
And when done, he also made a point of grabbing the "handle" in the back and showing how he could jerk me around. Yeah dude, I'm not your sub.
Since I was so lost at the lab, my conclusion is that I should work on my own with YouTube videos for a while before going back to another lab. I bit the bullet and ordered a couple of 30 foot lengths of pretty rope. Sure, I could just go to Home Depot, but I'm more likely to want to practice if I have pretty rope.
I still have hope. Hey if I can teach myself to produce something like this, a few knots shouldn't be so difficult should they?
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27 comments
I learned a new word. Merinthophilia is a sexual fetish where one is aroused by tying someone up or being tied up with rope or similar material.
That’s a new one for me, too! Thank you.
I don’t have the patience for heavy rope work and I accept that about myself.
I’m willing to bet you’d be much better at it with your kitting skills.
I think it was kind of rude of him to be looking at his phone too. I mean, you’re bottoming my dude, with someone new…and you’re pulling out your phone? Bad form.
Part of the reason I haven’t pursued it before now was assuming I wouldn’t have the patience (well, mostly not having a partner to practice with). But yes, with knitting I’ve discovered that I actually do have a hidden reserve of patience.
Those are some really fancy knots and a lot of work! But I agree, it did accentuate your boobs.
I think it's probably more fun to do, than to be the subject. Although there are definitely people who get a charge out of the process of being tied up. I have experienced that in a mild way in the past, but didn't really on Wednesday night - not enough chemistry with the guy who I was partnered with.
@smartasswoman It was really never my thing. Definitely never to be tied up myself. And some did ask me to do it to them but I did it by request and was never a serious bondage that they could not escape with some effort. So they felt safe.
Thank you for sharing. I found this so interesting. I had no idea that they have groups of people into this and that someone would teach it. This definitely made my bucket list.
I was surprised how many people are in this group and how active it is (they have two labs a month). They have a Discord server with multiple chat rooms about things like educational resources, upcoming events, where to buy rope, etc.
I'm starting to think the best way to learn would be to find a personal rope guru to work one on one with, but failing that there's always YouTube.
@CarpeJamie he has some interest in being restrained but not super interested in shibari. I’m sure he would indulge me if I wanted to practice some ties on him though.
What I meant by a guru is someone who already knows how to do it who would teach me.
@CarpeJamie he’s not often available on weeknights (when the labs are).
How about you get a manikin to practice on, you could then use it for your wool creation too.
I might do that. In fact I wishlisted a dressmaker form on Amazon quite a long time ago, with the thought of using it for fit checks for sweaters.
A mannequin would be a step beyond. Not sure if I want something like that around the house haha. I'm trying to accumulate less "stuff".
I've never understood the draw of being tied up to the extent of zero mobility. Some of the knots are very intricate and kind of pleasing to look at but I wouldn't want to be the one bound like that. Scarves and belts can be fun as a temporary display of dominance but that's where my limit is reached.
I can't really explain it, but I will say the one time I was totally restrained I did enjoy the feeling (at least briefly - maybe if it had gone on too long I would have felt different). Interestingly, in that situation it was a friend wrapping me up with pallet wrap - around and around my body like a mummy. It felt kind of snug and secure, probably how a baby feels when it's wrapped tightly in blankets.
@smartasswoman Interesting!! Thanks for sharing! I've heard that from other's as well. I think in the case of the cling film type of wrapping, I'd begin to panic. I'm a little claustrophobic if there's such a thing.
Personally not a fan of bondage but can appreciate the artistry of it. I have no doubt that a lady with your yarn skills can become a proficient ropester. Good for you getting out there and trying something new.
Thanks! I enjoy this kind of a challenge, just maybe not so much in front of other people who all know more than I do. I think a bit of self study will be beneficial.
Seems like he is a bit more advanced than he lead on....and wanted to show off. The detail of his rope on your back is very nice. Just seems like the thickness of the ropes wouldnt lend itself to such intricacy.
An interesting post Smarty. I just have the basic girl scout rope tying skill. Good Luck with it all ~
Thanks jajo! Onward I go.
Apparently, it takes a lot of skill and patience to get the knots right
Good luck with your lessons!
Thanks! If I never write about it again, you'll know that I failed. 😂
I dislike arrogant people. The ropes do enhance your breasts beautifully.
I love your swatch. The colors and pattern are gorgeous.
Hugs!!
Thank you! You can be sure there will be a picture of the full sweater when it's finished. 😊
I've always liked the way a rope "corset" looks over an outfit but that's about it... kudos to you for your patience with ML.
And rope corsets might be as far as this goes with me - I don't really picture myself hanging people from a hook in the ceiling.
Love it! I really want to.learn, but as you mentioned, not something you do lightly!
We'll see if joining this group and spending $40 on rope will be enough to make me stick with it this time...
Practice practice
Yep.
Count me as loving the way your boobs look too.
I understand this academically I think, the urge to be restrained or restrain another. I also think it'd drive me nuts.
What part would drive you nuts? Being restrained? Having to stand around doing nothing while someone arranged rope on you? Or as a top, having the patience to try to make the pretty knots when you’d rather be ravishing your rope bottom?
@smartasswoman "D"- All of the above.
Interesting and intricate; I guess your knitting experience with 'knits' and 'pearls' came in handy.
I can do braids. 😶
I honestly don’t know if there will be much crossover. But as I noted to enigma, knitting has allowed me to discover that I have more patience (and persistence) than I realized.
I don't have much experience with rope bondage. A rather elaborate scheme was demonstrated at the local BDSM studio once, but I was "otherwise engaged" for most of it. At G's request I dabbled a little with binding her but my efforts were pitiful. They actually had a rope tying class on my recent cruise! I got paired with one of the young hot naturalists, but alas this was about tying maritime ropes. 😂
You're smart and I'm sure with some patience you'll learn this kink. And YES, your bewbies look great in that shot!
I do know I need lots of repetition to engrave a skill in my brain. There is a fancy cast-on that I use when knitting...the first five or six projects where I used it, I had to review the YouTube video before getting started. Now I finally have the muscle memory to do it without thinking about it.
And hey, a knot is a knot, so that maritime class was probably useful. If I had even a Boy Scout's knowledge about things like a lark's head or a half hitch, I'd be way further along than I am.
No, one can't really dabble. And a willing partner...
My FWB is mildly willing but I don’t think he’s all that interested in fancy ties - just the basics of restraining someone.
If you need practice tying someone up you can practice on me.