Thank heavens that my ear surgery and ear bandage were a month ago, rather than right now. How irritating it would have been to have been mistaken for a MAGidiot!
On to a party report - we had a daytimers party yesterday.
Remember when I was meeting people in late 2022-early 2023 and numbering my prospects? Guy #3 was someone I had chatted with off and on, on the fetish site, who finally came through and had coffee with me in December 2022. I felt like we had a good conversation, but he didn't really pursue seeing me again. And at the same time, I was pretty content with my situation with HWD so I had no motivation to chase him. He would message me occasionally; I got the impression that perhaps he was more interested in knowing me so as to have an "in" to a kink party, than in actually dating me.
A couple months ago, amazingly, he showed up at one of our daytimers munches. He again said he was interested in attending a party so I dropped him a reminder when registration opened for this one.
As we moderators were reviewing the party applications, my friend M said he didn't know much about two of the applicants. One was the guy who was kind of an asshole to me at the rope lab I went to! The other was Guy #3. I took a little bit of petty enjoyment out of saying that I had met both guys and if we were only going to include one newbie, I'd pick Guy #3 over Asshole Rope Dom. 😃 I only wish Asshole Rope Dom knew the actual reason why he wasn't invited.
Anyway, Guy #3 showed up a bit late and missed our icebreaker game. In his favor though, he actually had read through the party requirements and had his vax card and negative covid test to show us at check-in.
I chatted with him a bit. He was pretty outgoing and had no problem chatting up other partygoers without needing me to introduce him around. He was watching the various scenes avidly - maybe a little too avidly? Just my impression. I'm a voyeur myself and shouldn't shame someone else for it...he was just a little too obvious about it for my tastes.
My friend K who I've scened with a number of times asked if I would top him - I agreed and we had a good impact scene. He's so stoic though. I was hitting him pretty hard and at one point he said, "You can hit me harder you know". FINE. I pulled my biggest paddle out of my toy bag (if I could post pictures I'd insert one here - it's called The Redeemer lol). I showed it to him. "Maybe ten?" he said. And so I finished up with ten thwacks.
Things have been a little awkward with K (he wants to be friends outside of the kink scene, but he's married, so I'm uncomfortable with taking that too far). But, weirdly, it felt like the scene mended some of the awkwardness and I asked him if he wanted to cuddle for a while on the aftercare bed (something we haven't done before). I went to throw the sheet we had had on the table into the laundry. On the way back to the aftercare bed, Guy #3 intercepted me. "THAT WAS HOT. I WANT THAT." I just said, "Oh you do, do you?" and continued on my way. 😂
A bit later in the party Guy #3 asked me, "Would you ever be on the receiving end of that?". He is more of a dom type so I think he was hoping to take that role. I told him it's pretty rare for me these days, because I'm less trusting than I used to be. He looked surprised, and I explained further that if someone is going to top me, I'd rather it's someone who I've seen in action and have an idea that they play safely and that their style is compatible with mine. He accepted that, and then asked if I would flog him.
Once some space opened up we headed over to a support pole in the middle of the room. I told him he could undress as much as he was comfortable with; he quickly took off all of his clothes. 😂 He said he had never been flogged before, so I told him I was going to start out very light and build up intensity gradually.
It wasn't long before he was wriggling with pleasure and waving his ass around, clearly enjoying the situation very much. Again, almost too much? I saw his hand stray down to touch himself a few times. If I were really dommely I would have yelled at him to stop that, haha!! But I just ignored it. As I was getting close to finishing, he muttered something. I asked him to repeat, he said, "Will you touch me down there?" I cheerfully said, "Nope!" and went to get cooldown toys. My new thing is a dog grooming glove with little plastic nubs on the palm. I've used it on three people now and it was a big hit with all of them. Apparently it feels quite pleasant. That was not my original intention but it makes it nice for a finisher.
We spent a little time on the aftercare bed. He was being goofy, rubbing his cold feet on my bare legs to warm up his feet. This caused me to feel a bit more kindly toward him. I do like someone who's not afraid to be goofy.
So, maybe I have a new play partner, although I'm not sure whether he'll follow through and apply for future parties, or if this was a one-off experiment for him.
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18 comments
May this encounter lead to more pleasant ones. One can so rarely know how a bit of social interaction will turn out. Each one is a leap in the dark or at least late twilight. I have to agree that finding someone not afraid to be goofy is a good sign for people who enjoy the unusual. (like me and apparently you.) I am rooting for you that this progresses into something warm, satisfying and long term.
Sending you big hugs.
I haven’t heard a peep from him so far, which I guess is not surprising since his efforts to stay in touch have always been very intermittent. I don’t really have any expectations. 🙂
I love a good flogging. I'm not into pain. I love the release and relaxation of it
Me too! I don't find it painful unless the top is hitting quite hard. It's more like a thud kind of massage.
Judging the correct degree of sting is not easy but can be so rewarding.
While none of the kink play appeals to me personally, I do enjoy reading about it and your perspective on it.
Thanks. 😊
It is annoying and often frustrating when someone can appear so clueless. Seems you are giving him the benefit of the doubt and the next interaction may convince you.
Yes, we'll see. 😊
I like the idea of cooldown toys to take the heat out of a situation.
PS. MAGA is increasingly a cult now that its leader is claiming that god is on his side!
Good news today though, that ol’ Joe finally saw the light.
@smartasswoman It was good news because the polls were dire.
Thanks for sharing. Just curious....what is a munch?
It's a kink group term for a casual, non-play get together - usually at a restaurant, therefore "munch". It's a way to get to know people in a low pressure situation, and for organizers to get a reading on the people who might be asking to attend a party in the future.
@smartasswoman Thanks for that explanation.
Always so interesting Smarty....ive learned lots . Those gloves look enticing for back rubs n such. And i cracked up abt the ear bandage reference....can u imagine....twining. ~
I mean…I honestly looked just like those wackos who are bandaging their ears in honor of the orange guy.
@smartasswoman ohhhh emgee.....im cracking up. Yup....twining..ya weirdo you......lollllolololo Well....actually he copied you ! So theres that~
Sounds like a good event.
I've recently been in contact with a lady I first met 20+ years ago. Much more recently she was the who introduced me to Fet. Hopefully we're going to a fire play party next Friday. That would not have been my first choice, but it's what was available on the day our schedules meshed.
I hope you have fun. I love watching fire play and would like to try it sometime.
Sounds like you take great pride in the responsibility of coordinating such events.
I wonder if your K might invite his wife to a party. Maybe it’ll be something they can share with one another.
Honestly, my friend M does 90% of the work but I'm happy to be there as a back-up.
K has not said a lot about his relationship with his wife, but my impression is that they're still living together but estranged. They try to get along so that family gatherings go smoothly (they both want to be able to see their grandchildren frequently and are agreed on that point). Aside from that, they seem to lead separate lives most of the time.
One of the first times I scened with K I asked if I needed to be careful about leaving marks and he said "no worries, my wife never sees my body".
@smartasswoman
Sadly, A lot of relationships are that way.
I think I’d rather be single than remain in a loveless or sexless relationship.
They are committed to being a family though, so I respect that.
🙂
@4playlist_Sugswt If I had to guess, they are trying to avoid the expense of divorcing and setting up separate households. I suppose I could see that strategy if things are at least cordial enough to be amiable roommates.
This sounds quite interesting.
Being involved with this group definitely adds a bit of spice to my life. 😊
@smartasswoman I has no clue groups like this existed
@CallMeMrWrong69 Any metro area of a decent size probably has at least a few kink groups that hold parties.
@smartasswoman Where does one look?
@CallMeMrWrong69 there’s a site that’s like fb for kinky people (can’t name it or my comment would be denied). On that site you can search for groups and events in your area.
It’s usually not an instant process to get to attend a party. Often the organizers want to do some form of vetting - meeting you face to face . Most groups have some non-play events - like a meet and greet at a park or restaurant - where you can get to know people.
@smartasswoman Thanks....I will start searching to see what I will find.
@CallMeMrWrong69 Combine the first half of fetish with life. 😊
At least he didn't get cold feet for the flogging 😂
That basement floor is cold, yo. I would never advise anyone to take off their socks, even if it looks uncool.
Well, isn't that interesting. I'm glad, even if it's not a regular thing, he was able to show you he was a decent guy.
I was probably overly sensitive about his voyeurism and so forth...because of the fact that I was the one that gave the OK to invite him. I was relieved when the other two moderators both concurred that he "wasn't creepy" lol. (that's about as bar as we'll go with a compliment after only seeing someone at one party).
The grooming gloves:
@pagancountrygirl that seems to be the consensus so far.
@YourSassyPussy interesting. I had another human recipient tonight who thought they felt fantastic.