The 'parasocial' word is the Cambridge Dictionary's word of the year. I never knew there's a Cambridge Dictionary having being brought up on the Oxford Dictionary. And don't get me started on the Merriam-Webster Dictionary; in legitimising American English, Noah Webster has a lot to answer for!
Parasocial means that you feel you have a relationship with someone, usually famous, whom you've never met and whom you don't know. It's quite an old word that can be dated back to the mid-1950s but it's come to the fore nowadays, presumably because of the age of celebrity. The word was first coined by two American sociologists, Donald Horton and Richard Wohl, in their journal article, 'Mass communication and para-social interaction: observations of intimacy at a distance', published in the Psychiatry journal in 1956. Here is an example of an academic word becoming popular. About time I say!
I've not had a parasocial relationship, though I've had my fair share of crushes. Audrey Hepburn has been and still remains my biggest crush. I've has had a brief thing for Suzi Quatro, Sylvia Kristel, Patti Smith, Julia Roberts, Anna Friel, Sandra Bullock and Louise Lear, a BBC weather presenter.
Have you had and/or are you having a parasocial relationship? And If so, who with?
Who have been your crushes? And who have you hero worshipped?
Though not crushes, I have sort-of hero-worshipped a few men from afar. My first was David Owen, a former Labour Foreign Secretary and co-founder of the Social Democratic party (SDP). I was a very active member of the SDP at the time. I even invited David Owen to my first wedding; at least he replied to me saying that he couldn't make the wedding. I've also had a thing for Alice Cooper, The Jam's Paul Weller and Echo & the Bunnymen's Ian McCulloch. Recently, I've found myself admiring the very camp performances of Steve Priest, the bassist of the glam rock band Sweet.
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When I think of parasocial relationships, I think of men who think their cam girls really like them... and then it all goes downhill from there. Many, many predatory men have a history of parasocial behavior with women, it's a huge red flag when it comes to safety. Watching porn and cammers is perfectly normal, but when it turns into believing there's a relationship there, that's no good.
Safe to say I've never had a parasocial relationship, and I don't think I've had a crush in a few years... but there's always hope!
I can imagine there's a lot and too many parasocial relationships on this site.
Parasocial? me?... hmmm.... Jason Statham perhaps?
Just kidding
I remember your Jason Statham crush!
@spunkycumfun Yep!
For me parasocial with porn stars..two questions with those stars ofc Monica Bellucci and some Italian stars too
It's a shame you only have a parasocial and not a sexual relationship with those porn stars!
@spunkycumfun but u should give me exceptional.. I'm in Egypt.. travel there and reach them hard u know that well exactly...if you meet another Egyptians and I bet they'll not understanding you maybe some of them have a crush but not reaching to this standard when you're asking them this question they're hard answer u because it's culture..but for me open minded I've this fantasy with those since when I was young.. maybe i get experience little this days and ofc different comparing to past
@Alfedofernanz200 You'll have to invite Monica Bellucci to come and visit you in Egypt!
@spunkycumfun lol 🤣🤣 dream
Hmmmm... Given that definition, to be a good Evangelical "Christian" one must have a Parasocial relationship with Jesus.
That's a very good point.
I've had crushes and have followed certain celebrities, but never felt like they were familiar to me. I wish, but no. Did not know of the term. Interesting.
Like you, I've had crushes but I knew they were just crushes and no more.
Unfortunately never been with anyone famous or like stalking. This is like saying certain stalkers are basically PARASOCIAL.
Good term one of which is fair because you have these people who want to be famous and celebrates but why ? The real doom and gloom is
Example I play guitar, bass , drums.
I’m not going to be famous I just play for myself
But some of these people on certain platforms do want to be famous and powerful.
The sad thing is we only have fifteen minutes of fame.
There’s literally no Glory in glory hole
Andy Warhol's words are very apt in this social media age. Thanks for stopping by.
Wow..such beauty .. and with a million dollar smile .... Hugs & kisses & licks.
Audrey Hepburn was very beautiful.
Hmmm, I don't think I've ever felt like I had a "relationship" with a celebrity? There are many podcasters who I admire and would love to have as friends though. Molly Wood, Ira Glass, Dan Savage, Tig Notaro (also a very funny stand-up comic), and recently Tim Miller. He's a gay dad, former Republican operative who became a "never-Trumper" and he's hilarious.
From comments below, I've realised that there may be parasocial relationships on an online site like this one without involving famous people.
@spunkycumfun ah! In that case I think it could be argued that I have parasocial friendships with you and Enigma.
@smartasswoman That's good to know. Does that mean I now have to regularly look out of my window to check that you're not stalking me?! Only kidding.
I have to admit that I have had parasocial situations about two celebs. And they weren't crushes. OK. One was a crush and still is some 35 years later (Elizabeth Shue I'm still waiting for your call). The other was a comedian that I met. We lived in the same area. We met a few times and attended the same events. We even hung out socially together as we had friends in common. That ended the parasocial relationship. When I moved, the little relationship that existed was over.
Elisabeth Shue is sexy, and it's unforgivable that she didn't return your call!
River Phoenix i am big fan.. every year on Halloween i get quiet sad and cry a lot. He really meant something to me.... Johhny Depp yes.mmmm have dirty thoughts about his. Girl crushes Elizabeth Taylor, Marilyn Monroe ( her softness) Audrey, Gia the model who died from aids.... all for different reason than looks
It seems we share a fondness for Audrey Hepburn.
@spunkycumfun i love audrey hepburn. Breakfast at tiffany's is one of my favorite movies. She had a style, an elegance and a grace, and just a little quirkiness about her that made her interesting. Of course, she lived her life giving to others as a united nations.Ambassador. I'm sure this is due to the effect of world war two on her. I'm sorry.The older movie stars just had something that today's movie stars.Don't have.
Elizabeth taylor she was sexy soft and strong and she was abroad not a lady.. Maybe that's why. Besides the fact she was just beautiful that men went to her like honeybees.
Marilyn monroe she oozed sexiness.She also had a softness and a gentleness about her.And then underneath it all, she was really smart.But no one could see it until they got to know her.. Men love when they find something unexpected about a woman. And her smartness definitely done it.
@Kb20244 Audrey Hepburn had everything about her, and even a quick wit.
@spunkycumfun that she did
I'm listening about this word last week in program
That word is travelling far.
Parasocial? I'm barely regular social!
No celebrity crushes, though there are many that I think are attractive.
I do have a new "hero" ... a Drag Comedian called Fulla Regrets. I want to tell stories like her!
I've not come across Fulla Regrets, I'll look out for her/him.
Am I a parasitical? No. I’m hardly social. Have I had a crush more than “ looking at pictures “? Again no. I’ll liked to look at Elle McPherson back in the day, but I wasn’t trying to find out everything about her or going to a show hoping for a glimpse
Elle Macpherson was hot and probably still is hot.
Have you had and/or are you having a parasocial relationship? No
And If so, who with? No one this seems a bit silly to me.
Who have been your crushes? No one
And who have you hero worshipped? No one
This was an interesting read today, thank you for sharing with us. And I hope your enjoying a relaxing Sunday..
You are totally healthy.
Most of my parasocial crushes are musicians. A few of them I have met in person and the crush disappeared quickly. Others I have met in person and the crush went even deeper. One meeting went so far as a lot of reciprocal flirting in the greenroom before and after the show. I still consider that one - one that got away.
I can well imagine a crush disappearing once meeting that person and the fantasy bears no or little resemblance to the reality.
@spunkycumfun That happens more often than not since most celebrities are trying to keep up a persona. However, once in a while you meet one who is genuine. When that happens, for me, the crush get stronger.
@MaxxxPleasure711 I can understand what you say. I've not really met any celebrities.
😇🤔 possibly
It's got to be Stormy Daniels!
@spunkycumfun possibly previous her now no
My wife and I were over at a friends house sitting in the hot tub with a little wine (a lot), and the question came up; "If you were to receive a "hall pass" from your wife/husband, who would it be?" My wife immediately blurted out, "Patrick Swayze!" "He's so sexy!" "His ass is amazing!" I replied, "Raquel Welsch" "She's so sexy and classy". My friends wife had her choice also, but I don't recall, but someone very hot at the time. So the question came around to my friend. He was really contemplating an answer. He suddenly exclaimed; "The Barbie Twins!" We all looked at each other with a questioning stare. "Who...?" "The Barbie Twins?" We all erupted in laughter! "With all the beautiful women out there, you picked the Barbie Twins?"
His choice came up in conversation several times over the next few months, and his birthday was soon approaching. I told my wife, I had the perfect gift for him! I traveled to Toys R Us and found the perfect gift! I headed back to my garage, where I cut, stained and finished a piece of mohogany for a base and mounted 2 Bikini Barbies, back-to-back in a provacative pose.
We had a big birthday party for him and presented it to him in front of everyone. I said, "This is something you've been dreaming of for a long time." "Here is your wish come true" He opened the box and stared back at me with dagger eyes. "Now you can spend as much time as you need with your very own Berbie Twins!" The place erupted in laughter. He was a good sport about it and placed it on the shelf in his game room where it sat in memorium.
Long post I know, but it seemed fitting.
Your comment is most fitting. I'm wondering whether your friend did anything naughty with his gift!
Having a music crush on Edwin McCain for many years, I've always fancied the what if? However, for the many years of my girl crush, I'd rather have him as a friend. Pick his brain and wanna know why he writes the music that he does. I've met him on several occasions, and I might even be familiar to him at this point. But as always, it's more important to me to have a crush as a friend more than anything else. Now I do have a huge crush on an independent singer who I call my favorite ginger. He's many years younger than me, but there's just something about him That has always gave me a longing. I met him 11 years ago on my journey with the BC and we have a huge flirtatious but loving platonic friendship. I've seen him go through girls and I've always been a little jealous. However, I would never wanna lose his friendship. He's now a happily devoted father to a little girl, and he and his partner, and I are very friendly and loving towards each other. But in the back of my heart, there will always be longing. Great postpunk I always look forward to your subjects. !🎸🥰
You have some great and very interesting musical friends.
Heidi Klum! Oh sure, a rocking body, but she also comes off as just so playful and fun.
I hear she hosts great Halloween parties. I hope you get an invite to next year's party!
Is stalking a extreme case of parasocialism ?
Stalking a famous person sounds very and worryingly parasocial.